Give me the ups?

We've hear the quote ... Sooner or later, a man, if he is wise, discovers that life is a mixture of good days and bad, victory and defeat, give and take. He learns that it doesn't pay to be a sensisitive soul; that he should let some things go over his head like water off a ducks back. He learns that he who loses his temper usually loses. (anonymous)

Yet, knowing life is a series of ups and downs, I've always just wanted the "ups", but maybe I've been short sighted. This past week is a case in point. I needed to spend three days on a Washington DC trip. I was on a panel to advise grant money awards, but just so wished I could stay home and get ready for classes.

My first night at the Hilton (how I so love to be in a place where their job is to make me happy) I was watching a PBS broadcast on World War II. They chronicled the experience of a man who had spent eight years in a prisoner of war camp. He talked about walking for two days on a death march with no food and only a swallow of water (his tongue was so swollen, it wouldn't go back in his mouth), the pain of torture, having a rod shoved down his throat so he wouldn't scream. He talked about solitary confinement - that being the worst - and using the tap code through the walls to communicate with other prisoners.


They would spell out words and sentences by tapping on the wall. The coding was a five by five grid with all the letters except K. tap tap tap pause tap tap was "M". They taught the system to the new prisoners coming into the camp. To say this was difficult is quite an understatement, and punishment for communicating in any way whatsoever was brutal. Yet, they tapped. They might tap out GBY for "God Bless You". The communication literally saved their lives. What helped keep them sane was the ability to communicate. They needed to talk. They needed to be heard. They needed to feel connected, so they needn't feel alone.


At the end of the interview, they asked the man if he could remove his prisoner of war experience from his life - it just didn't happen - would he do it? Now obviously, that is a theoretical question as there is no way to remove it and no way to know what would have replaced it, but I thought his answer was interesting. He said, "No, for I learned so much about myself. I learned coping skills and what was important to me, what makes life worth living. It made me what I am today."


It really hit me as I had been wanting to "remove my trip to DC" from my life - just not have to go. Yet, I really had a great time in DC. I had seen the sights already and there was little time for sight seeing anyway. Yet it was a time for reflection - a time to refocus my attention and set goals. So here is what I decided I should do differently:

1. Deliberately attempt things that will stretch you - church calling, scripture reading, personal history writing, professional development. Unless you are failing a good share of the time, you are trying things that are just too easy.
2. Stretch your vocabulary. There are wonderful words out there that we never use. (People on the panel seemed to exhibit such a rich use of language.)
3. Technology is awesome - ipods, digital cameras, kindles, cellphones. Learn about iphone apps, Second Life, and other new developments. Don't be left in the dust.
4. Try to exceed my OWN expectations
5. Don't allow those I supervise to slide - they need to kick it up a notch.
6. Try some new recipes. I spent three days and spent $15 in food total (of course fruit and breads were available at the meetings). Mediterranean food is awesome. Pesto cavatappi at Noodles and Company was seriously good. I need to try to make it!

The things people say...

My niece, Lisa, writes the cutest things her kids say. Well, I have no little kids to say cute things, but I did think Grandma was a card at dinner today. She looked at Greg and said, "You sure do look good with hair!" I thought it was pretty funny.

During fast meeting, Gene M. bore his testimony about the nature of God and personal exaltation. A friend of his said that they thought the next life would consist of sitting at the feet of God and gazing upon him. Gene said, "I'd rather go to hell and shovel coal. I need to be busy." I thought it was pretty funny, but I'm with him. Having nothing to do is FAR worse for me that having way too much to do. I'm not very good with leisure.

Norm C passed away a month ago. He was a MASTER at flower arranging. He had his own business in California. He's done floral arrangements for department stores and temples. His yard is always amazing. His vision was really bad towards the end. Kelly said to him, "That must be really hard not to see clearly when you have spent your whole life appreciating things of beauty. It must be tough not to see." Norm's response was, "Oh, no, without my vision, I see the best I've ever seen. I see the things God wants me to see, the things that are most important." This is the same man that (near the end) he was in the hospital. His daughter came into his room to hear him singing to himself. The song? I Am a Child of God. What a sweetheart.

A Late Christmas

We opened present after we got home. Chelle and Ben hadn't opened their presents from us. Kimberly, Greg, Steve, and I had presents to open as well.

The kids gave us a gorgeous picture of the five kids (from Michelle's wedding) for over the piano. They also gave us an Ipod Nano, movies, The Five Love Languages, and a GPS system. Thanks! What great gifts.

Zach had nothing left to open, but as you can see, that didn't keep him from having fun. He loved the picture taking. After every one, he would yell, "Can I see it?"

Favorite memories:

• Zach eating cold cereal (while the girls went to New Moon) and exclaiming, "I'm having a great dinner!"

• Halle grunting for food. You could not eat without offering her something. She LOVED potatoes and green beans, but rolls and cereal were also favorites. The bottle holds little appeal for her now.
• Watching Halle "army crawl" all over the place.
• Halle's first step - witnessed by Kimberly and Brandon. It won't be long before she it walking. She is "determination plus". Zach and I were trying to "play" Blokus, but Halle could get to those pieces despite obstacles (and Grandma) in her way.
• Brandon starting a new job with Jacobs! Way to go!
  
• Playing "stack" and losing abominably every time.
  
• When I asked Zach what he wanted to do today, he responded by saying, "I want to sleep with Aunt Kim." The previous evening he had gone up to her room while the rest of us played games, and they had a great time playing on the bed.
• Having everybody help clean up after dinner. :-)
  
• Eating New Year's Eve dinner at 3pm, so Trisha could get home before dark. That was a great plan! All the work was done early, so we could spend the evening playing "Hand and Foot" and watching the new Star Trek movie (I even stayed awake).
• Having Greg's power supply "strangely" stop working after Halle sucked on it.
• Kim giving everybody massages and examining various muscle structures on babies and adults - as homework for her massage therapy class.
• Greg heading off to work (at ICON) even though he would rather have stayed home with the fam. What dedication! It has been so great to have Greg back home with us. He gets things done! He fixed the garage door, arranged for higher speed internet, and saved us $30 a month on our Dish network plan. Way to go! He is a problem solver. He figures out what needs to be done, and does it! Greg came home for a visit in November, but landed a job, and hasn't left. He's taken the law exam - and plans to start in the fall. With so few months before he will be gone, a job is a cherished item.
  

More Thanksgiving memories

Yes, that is Halle chewing on a snake. Chelle and I were babysitting and we thought it was so cute.

Don't you love Drew in his "crown", straw, and necklace? What a doll!

Chocolate Dipping - Thanksgiving time

As you can see, chocolate dipping is a family event. Greg, Michelle, Trisha and Kimberly were the dippers. Lori, Brandon, and Kram helped by tending the kids. Steve was our chocolate melter. It is a great bonding time.

While the neighborhood no longer exchanges gifts at Christmas (preferring to spend the money on humanitarian projects like sub for Santa), Kim, Michelle, and Trisha all dipped for their neighbors. Since Lori is allergic to chocolate, dipping holds little appeal for her. I think we dipped close to 30 pounds of chocolate (or 60 pounds of finished candy). We dipped peanut clusters, mints, caramel, Bavarian mints, English Toffee. We also made French Almond Nougat, but didn't dip it. Diet here I come!

This year I tried something new with the mints - after having half the batches go sugary. I tried dissolving the sugar (as best I could) by stirring it over low heat for a long while before bringing it to a boil. The one batch I did that way turned out perfect. Maybe I'll finally master it. I miss not being able to call Mom and say, "What am I doing wrong?" We used to have that conversation quite often. Usually the answer was, "I don't know. I don't have that problem."

Sunday Victoria: Church, Craigdarroch Castle, Museum

On Sunday, we went to church at the Victoria 1st Ward. It was amazing how similar the church looks to ones we see in the states. It was fun to be there, and I found myself wishing we could stay the whole block. We needed to check out of our hotel, so we had planned to return after sacrament meeting.

We went to the Royal BC Museum near our hotel. We saw glimpses of the first nations culture before the arrival of the British. Amazing how the story of Europeans coming to a country always results in the destruction of that native culture. We learned about Salish people - a subgroup of the Native American culture (in British Columbia, Washington, and Oregon).

The natural history museum was really interesting, showing animals in their natural habitat. There was also a modern history gallery showing coal mining, logging, and quaint villages. It was amazing - well worth the time.

We also went to Craigdarroch castle (as it was closed the previous day). I was expecting a castle like we saw in Ireland (run down, cold, ancient, lots of old family portraits). This was quite different. It was build in 1890 by a coal tycoon, Robert Dunsmuir, (who actually died before the castle was finished). It really wasn't a military establishment, so I'm not quite sure why it is called a castle instead of just a mansion. It is over 20,000 square feet, 28 acres (originally) and four stories. The woodwork inside is gorgeous. It has been used for many movies (such as Little Women). Stained glass windows are everywhere and all the rooms are staged to look like they may have been when the Dunsmuirs lived there. In one of the upper rooms, a woman told a story to children. The story was about trolls and seemed to have been constructed just so she could use different voices, talk in a funny accent, sing, and pantomime - but it was fun.







Cherri asked, "Why Vancouver?" No real reason. Kimberly knew people who had been there - and none of us had been there before. It was fun, but going there during the summer would have been better for the gardens. We hadn't brought winter sports attire so ice skating, skiing, and snow boarding lost its appeal. It was about 38 degrees Fahrenheit, but it seemed much colder. I'm not sure why. Maybe because we were outside so much.

Things were super expensive. The ferry to Victoria was $240 (round trip) - so I was glad we stayed the night. Gas was high everywhere -$1.05 a liter (almost $4 a gallon). Kim got HP discounts on hotels and the rental car, so that was great.

We brought out passports, not really believing we would need them. Lucky we did, as border crossing was serious business and passports were strictly required.

Victoria Butchart Gardens

Butchart Gardens is beautiful - even in winter. For Christmas, they had the twelve days of Christmas enacted. Steve is being a partridge (in the pear tree behind him). The pictures of the ocean are on the ferry ride to Victoria.

The picture with the lights is of the capital in Victoria.

Santa in Vancouver

We had taken pictures with these guys before, but when we saw them in Santa hats we had to stop again. There were tons of other people doing the exact same things - mimicking the statues. What a hit!

Lynn Canyon Bridge

Christmas Day was Lynn Canyon Bridge. We worried that Steve wouldn't be able to handle the suspension bridge - as his fear of heights is legendary. But he made it. The park was officially closed, but the 300 other people that were there didn't seem to notice. It was a beautiful park! We had a great Christmas day.