I'll bet you wonder what I'm doing. I'm trying to find stuff about Mom, but since there is no organization to my files, I'm finding all sorts of stuff.
I just read my patriarchal blessing. I found several things in my blessing that I have NEVER seen before. That is so amazing how that happens. At each stage in my life, I see totally different things in it.
When I first got it, I remember thinking it was pretty boring. Nothing exciting at all. Little did I understand. Pearls before swine, I guess.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Oldies but goodies...
(1981) The women's conference was really good. I especially enjoyed the keynote speaker, an Ida Smith from BYU. Usually we are given the same old advice: give, serve, be unselfish, care for your family, set the tone of your home, support your husband, etc, etc. etc. Her advice was like none I have ever received through the church. She sounded like me speaking, only bolder. Here are some of the things she had to say. She talked about priorities.
1st You and Your relationship to the Lord. This is not selfish. In the judgment, you go alone. You can't say, "Well, if he would have” or ''If my children would have..." It is what you have done. Be gospel scholars. Develop every talent - so that you can be of great service. You can't give from an empty vessel. She talked about working mothers, too. Women work for the money. Take away the pay and see how long you would stay. They work to put sons on missions, to pay the building fund, to give their kids piano lessons, etc. Never judge another's reasons for working. What is necessity for one is luxury for another. But she said, "Your working is not the silver bullet that affects your kids, your attitude it." She said, "I was shocked to discover a few years ago that I had been raised by a 'working mother'. Both my parents worked, but I never felt neglected or disadvantaged. I didn't have a part time mother. We all knew what her priorities were."
2nd Your relationship to your Spouse. This is the most important relationship in your family. Marriage should be a partnership of equals. She asked the Question, "Could you or your spouse cope without the other? Do you know where the insurance is, how to pay bills? Does he know how to cook, do laundry, etc.?"
3rd Your children. Teach them to be responsible, independent, and God-loving. The Lord did not say, "Have perfect children". He did say, “Teach them." Don't let anyone pressure you to have a certain number of kids. Only humans are in the numbers game. God is not. Let your children do things for you. If children do things for parents, they will love parents as much as parents love children. She also said, "It never occurred to me that there was anything I couldn't do, because my mother knew I could."
4th Church
5th. Community
She ended her first talk with - Stop killing your self. You can't do everything everyday. The Lord knows that. Get off each others' cases. Don't compare yourself to others. - Being is more important that doing. Cherish the NOW
Women in a Man's world
Her next talk was about Women in a Man's world. She stated we need to value one another, view each other the way the Lord does. She talked about the percent of women in the work force. 47% of the women in Colorado are working. They make 57% of the money a man makes. In other words for every dollar a man makes, a woman will make 57 cents. That's why women are going into non-traditional jobs. In non-traditional jobs, women can make 92 cents for every dollar a man makes. She asked how many women in the audience had been in the work force at some point in their adult lives. Everyone but two or three hands went up. If you work, you may as well be earning top dollar. One in three households with children is supported by a woman. She talked about the tendency of women to try to hide their intelligence.
Read the D&C 88th section and you will realize what your responsibilities are. Research was done on a group of five year olds. The boys were asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" They answered, "Oh. We would be doctors, lawyers, engineers, etc." The girls said they wanted to be Mommies or nurses. The boys were asked what they would be when they grew up if they were girls. Everything got silent. One replied. "I guess we wouldn't be anything. The girls were asked what they would be if they were boys. Excitedly they responded, "Oh we would be doctors, lawyers, etc. At age five!
She addressed 200 freshmen and sophomores at the Y. She asked them some questions not expecting them to raise their hands, but was shocked at the numbers responding. She asked the men, “How many of you want to marry someone who is not as smart as you are?" Almost all the hands went up. She chastised them, telling them they ought to marry the smartest gal they could find to be their spouse and the mother of their children. She asked the women, "How many of you have ever tried to hide your intelligence to be attractive to men?" Every hand went up. She turned to the men and said, “Look what you have done to them!”
She asked the men if they had ever been led to feel superior because they were male. Almost all said yes. She asked the women if they had ever been led to feel inferior because they were female. Almost all said yes.
Sexism is real and we need to be cautious of the implications we give.
She talked about happy marriages. The one who has the most power is the happiest. Usually that is the man. The happiest marriages are those where the wife works part time. She has her own money to spend, and her opinion is usually valued more by her husband. She said, “It’s too bad it takes a job to accomplish this, but it is usually the case.
American women take responsibility for the failures in the home, but don’t take credit for the good things.
She told of a male colleague whose wife had started swimming three miles a day and teaching a few classes. His comment was, “I just can’t believe the difference her activities have made in our relationship. If someone would have told me that her participating in success in this small way would have made such a difference in her, I wouldn’t have believed it.” Have your own victories.
House work is no longer economically crucial as compared to the days when women did farm work and helped in home centered businesses. If a man sees women's work as beneath him, soon the wife feels SHE is beneath him. Both need to participate in the house work. There shouldn’t be women's work and men's work. There isn’t a lot of fulfillment in housework. You need to grow mentally.
Lastly, receive your own revelation. You have the Holy Ghost for that very purpose. You needn’t rely on a bishop or a stake president to tell you what is best for you and your husband. You find your own answers.
1st You and Your relationship to the Lord. This is not selfish. In the judgment, you go alone. You can't say, "Well, if he would have” or ''If my children would have..." It is what you have done. Be gospel scholars. Develop every talent - so that you can be of great service. You can't give from an empty vessel. She talked about working mothers, too. Women work for the money. Take away the pay and see how long you would stay. They work to put sons on missions, to pay the building fund, to give their kids piano lessons, etc. Never judge another's reasons for working. What is necessity for one is luxury for another. But she said, "Your working is not the silver bullet that affects your kids, your attitude it." She said, "I was shocked to discover a few years ago that I had been raised by a 'working mother'. Both my parents worked, but I never felt neglected or disadvantaged. I didn't have a part time mother. We all knew what her priorities were."
2nd Your relationship to your Spouse. This is the most important relationship in your family. Marriage should be a partnership of equals. She asked the Question, "Could you or your spouse cope without the other? Do you know where the insurance is, how to pay bills? Does he know how to cook, do laundry, etc.?"
3rd Your children. Teach them to be responsible, independent, and God-loving. The Lord did not say, "Have perfect children". He did say, “Teach them." Don't let anyone pressure you to have a certain number of kids. Only humans are in the numbers game. God is not. Let your children do things for you. If children do things for parents, they will love parents as much as parents love children. She also said, "It never occurred to me that there was anything I couldn't do, because my mother knew I could."
4th Church
5th. Community
She ended her first talk with - Stop killing your self. You can't do everything everyday. The Lord knows that. Get off each others' cases. Don't compare yourself to others. - Being is more important that doing. Cherish the NOW
Women in a Man's world
Her next talk was about Women in a Man's world. She stated we need to value one another, view each other the way the Lord does. She talked about the percent of women in the work force. 47% of the women in Colorado are working. They make 57% of the money a man makes. In other words for every dollar a man makes, a woman will make 57 cents. That's why women are going into non-traditional jobs. In non-traditional jobs, women can make 92 cents for every dollar a man makes. She asked how many women in the audience had been in the work force at some point in their adult lives. Everyone but two or three hands went up. If you work, you may as well be earning top dollar. One in three households with children is supported by a woman. She talked about the tendency of women to try to hide their intelligence.
Read the D&C 88th section and you will realize what your responsibilities are. Research was done on a group of five year olds. The boys were asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" They answered, "Oh. We would be doctors, lawyers, engineers, etc." The girls said they wanted to be Mommies or nurses. The boys were asked what they would be when they grew up if they were girls. Everything got silent. One replied. "I guess we wouldn't be anything. The girls were asked what they would be if they were boys. Excitedly they responded, "Oh we would be doctors, lawyers, etc. At age five!
She addressed 200 freshmen and sophomores at the Y. She asked them some questions not expecting them to raise their hands, but was shocked at the numbers responding. She asked the men, “How many of you want to marry someone who is not as smart as you are?" Almost all the hands went up. She chastised them, telling them they ought to marry the smartest gal they could find to be their spouse and the mother of their children. She asked the women, "How many of you have ever tried to hide your intelligence to be attractive to men?" Every hand went up. She turned to the men and said, “Look what you have done to them!”
She asked the men if they had ever been led to feel superior because they were male. Almost all said yes. She asked the women if they had ever been led to feel inferior because they were female. Almost all said yes.
Sexism is real and we need to be cautious of the implications we give.
She talked about happy marriages. The one who has the most power is the happiest. Usually that is the man. The happiest marriages are those where the wife works part time. She has her own money to spend, and her opinion is usually valued more by her husband. She said, “It’s too bad it takes a job to accomplish this, but it is usually the case.
American women take responsibility for the failures in the home, but don’t take credit for the good things.
She told of a male colleague whose wife had started swimming three miles a day and teaching a few classes. His comment was, “I just can’t believe the difference her activities have made in our relationship. If someone would have told me that her participating in success in this small way would have made such a difference in her, I wouldn’t have believed it.” Have your own victories.
House work is no longer economically crucial as compared to the days when women did farm work and helped in home centered businesses. If a man sees women's work as beneath him, soon the wife feels SHE is beneath him. Both need to participate in the house work. There shouldn’t be women's work and men's work. There isn’t a lot of fulfillment in housework. You need to grow mentally.
Lastly, receive your own revelation. You have the Holy Ghost for that very purpose. You needn’t rely on a bishop or a stake president to tell you what is best for you and your husband. You find your own answers.
Trip down memory lane...
(Kim is 2 and a half) The other day, Kim was watching "Leave it to Beaver" on TV. They were talking about lying and Beaver made the comment that you should never lie because your parents always find out. Kim heard that and said, "They wouldn't find out if you didn't have a big sister.”
(Kim is 2 and a half) Kimmer's shoes were in such bad shape, I was afraid I would be receiving little care packages from friends and neighbors. We finally broke down and bought her some new shoes. We bought some thongs and some patent leather shoes. I had her try on some tennis shoes at the last. She was very tired so I put one of each style on each foot. She looked down at them and yelled at the top of her voice, "I hate them. They don't even match." Needless to say we quickly ended our shopping spree.
(Kim is 2 and a half) Kimmer's shoes were in such bad shape, I was afraid I would be receiving little care packages from friends and neighbors. We finally broke down and bought her some new shoes. We bought some thongs and some patent leather shoes. I had her try on some tennis shoes at the last. She was very tired so I put one of each style on each foot. She looked down at them and yelled at the top of her voice, "I hate them. They don't even match." Needless to say we quickly ended our shopping spree.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
You find what you are looking for
We went to the play Blithe Spirit (a British comedy by Noel Coward) on Wednesday. On a scale of 1-10, it was about a 3. Not my favorite, but there were a few funny parts. I kept thinking, "If this were on TV, I'd change the channel." That is not a good thought to entertain if you are going to enjoy the play.
I've been doing a lot of reading lately: The Help, The Language of Sycamores, The Summer Kitchen, My Grandfather's Son, The Undaunted, and am currently reading Vienna Prelude. The Help is the best, but I really liked My Grandfather's Son as well!
It is easy to become critical: too self-serving, the love story is too predictable, everything turns out too perfectly, unrealistic plot, the characters are shallow. Vienna Prelude is the first volume of a twelve volume sequence on Nazi Germany. The lead character is a beautiful and talented violin player. It becomes a little trite as everywhere she goes yet another man falls in love with her because of her beauty. I hate the message that important or loveable women MUST be beautiful and talented at everything. I would much rather hear about ordinary people who were successful. The message that only beautiful and talented people are successful gives the bulk of humanity the excuse to say, "Well, I would try harder if I were just beautiful and talented." A good friend recommended the book, so I'm practicing looking beyond this annoying factor and looking for other admirable traits. I think in life, you find what you are looking for.
A while back I went to a faculty member's lecture. He is quite well liked, so I was expecting his class to be great. He had an annoying habit of repeating the same no content phrase at the end of every sentence or two. Once I noticed it, I started marking each time he said it in order to figure out if it was as bad as I thought. It was. It about drove me crazy. I couldn't even hear what he said because I was so distracted by his constant repetition. The rest of the class wasn't phased. Because I was looking for it, that is all I heard.
I have a friend who struggles with church attendance. She said to me once, "Church is so boring. I hate it when they just read to me. I'd rather be home reading scriptures on my own or doing extraction." At first, I wasn't sure what kind of ward she attended where people just read the lessons, but after she mentioned that, I noticed how much of lesson time is spend just reading - scriptures, quotes, stories. Since my mine wanders whenever someone reads, I can relate to her concern.
My conclusion is that you find what you are looking for. If you are looking for some reason not to enjoy a book, listen during a lecture, or enjoy church, there are always plenty of aspects to criticize. The real talent is not in finding the things you dislike, but in applauding the positive.
I've been doing a lot of reading lately: The Help, The Language of Sycamores, The Summer Kitchen, My Grandfather's Son, The Undaunted, and am currently reading Vienna Prelude. The Help is the best, but I really liked My Grandfather's Son as well!
It is easy to become critical: too self-serving, the love story is too predictable, everything turns out too perfectly, unrealistic plot, the characters are shallow. Vienna Prelude is the first volume of a twelve volume sequence on Nazi Germany. The lead character is a beautiful and talented violin player. It becomes a little trite as everywhere she goes yet another man falls in love with her because of her beauty. I hate the message that important or loveable women MUST be beautiful and talented at everything. I would much rather hear about ordinary people who were successful. The message that only beautiful and talented people are successful gives the bulk of humanity the excuse to say, "Well, I would try harder if I were just beautiful and talented." A good friend recommended the book, so I'm practicing looking beyond this annoying factor and looking for other admirable traits. I think in life, you find what you are looking for.
A while back I went to a faculty member's lecture. He is quite well liked, so I was expecting his class to be great. He had an annoying habit of repeating the same no content phrase at the end of every sentence or two. Once I noticed it, I started marking each time he said it in order to figure out if it was as bad as I thought. It was. It about drove me crazy. I couldn't even hear what he said because I was so distracted by his constant repetition. The rest of the class wasn't phased. Because I was looking for it, that is all I heard.
I have a friend who struggles with church attendance. She said to me once, "Church is so boring. I hate it when they just read to me. I'd rather be home reading scriptures on my own or doing extraction." At first, I wasn't sure what kind of ward she attended where people just read the lessons, but after she mentioned that, I noticed how much of lesson time is spend just reading - scriptures, quotes, stories. Since my mine wanders whenever someone reads, I can relate to her concern.
My conclusion is that you find what you are looking for. If you are looking for some reason not to enjoy a book, listen during a lecture, or enjoy church, there are always plenty of aspects to criticize. The real talent is not in finding the things you dislike, but in applauding the positive.
The boat
Here is the picture of the boat they took when we bought it. We have had it out on the lake several times. Here is a picture Trisha took this weekend.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
If you see a whole thing
A friend in the ward in dying. She's a bit older than I, but not old enough to be passing on. She has been dying for two years, but now the time seems close. She can't eat much. Visits tire her out. In trying to think of what to do for her, our inspired Relief Society president asked each person to send a note or thought that we can put into a book for her - that she can read when she has energy.
I've been trying to figure out what you say to someone who is dying. Most of the catchy phrases are for the living. So, these quotes don't really work for my friend, but I did like them.
If you see a whole thing - it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets, lives.... But close up a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern.- Ursula K. Le Guin
Love doesn't just sit there like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new. - Ursula K. Le Guin
Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got. ~Art Buchwald
Don't be fooled by the calendar. There are only as many days in the year as you make use of. ~Charles Richards
Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.- Carl Sandburg
Life would be much easier if I had the source code.- Unknown
Life is what you make of it. Always has been, always will be.- Grandma Moses
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. - Albert Einstein
You live longer once you realize that any time spent being unhappy is wasted. ~Ruth E. Renkl
I've been trying to figure out what you say to someone who is dying. Most of the catchy phrases are for the living. So, these quotes don't really work for my friend, but I did like them.
If you see a whole thing - it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets, lives.... But close up a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern.- Ursula K. Le Guin
Love doesn't just sit there like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new. - Ursula K. Le Guin
Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got. ~Art Buchwald
Don't be fooled by the calendar. There are only as many days in the year as you make use of. ~Charles Richards
Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.- Carl Sandburg
Life would be much easier if I had the source code.- Unknown
Life is what you make of it. Always has been, always will be.- Grandma Moses
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. - Albert Einstein
You live longer once you realize that any time spent being unhappy is wasted. ~Ruth E. Renkl
Monday, June 7, 2010
How to post pictures
Take a look at the Lee Hurst History link from my blog. I'm trying to put Mom's history on the blog so you can comment and add your own entries. However, adding pictures is PAINFUL. I can only add them one at a time (and they are slow to upload). And once I get them there, I can't arrange them.
Google tells me of a great way to add a bunch of pictures at at time (through an email post), but since my mailer makes me add pictures one at a time AND limits the size of my emails - that didn't work too well. I don't have anything like a "select all" under attachments. Google also tells me I can drag files into the attachments, but that didn't work either. I'm using Outlook Web Access Light. Maybe I just need a new mailer.
Any hints would be appreciated - as well as any entries you want to make in Mom's history.
Google tells me of a great way to add a bunch of pictures at at time (through an email post), but since my mailer makes me add pictures one at a time AND limits the size of my emails - that didn't work too well. I don't have anything like a "select all" under attachments. Google also tells me I can drag files into the attachments, but that didn't work either. I'm using Outlook Web Access Light. Maybe I just need a new mailer.
Any hints would be appreciated - as well as any entries you want to make in Mom's history.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
All things work together for good
The excitement for the week is cleaning the garage, going to the temple, and trying to get tomato plants to live.
I did teach today; Here's the lesson. It has some good stories.
All Things Work Together for Good Elder James B. Martino
** [D&C 90:24]: “Search diligently, pray always, and be believing, and all things shall work together for your good, if ye walk uprightly.”
Stunning promise - repeated many times in the scriptures, particularly to people or prophets who are suffering through the trials.
As a young girl in Primary, I was told that if I had the faith of a mustard seed, I could move mountains. I had no real need to move a mountain, but I did have something else I wanted. I wanted a magic wand. I had heard about them and knew of their power, so I decided to put my faith to work on getting a magic wand. Now, of course, my teacher told us that we couldn’t just expect our prayers to be answered immediately. I had complete faith that if I just prayed long enough and hard enough my prayer would be answered in the affirmative. It wasn’t. Why?
All suffering has a purpose!
Joseph B Wirthlin: I have lived long enough to experience firsthand many of the challenges of life. I have known exceptional people who have endured severe trials while others, at least on the surface, seem to have lived charmed lives. Often those who struggle with adversity ask the question “Why did this happen to me?” They spend sleepless nights wondering why they feel so lonely, sick, discouraged, oppressed, or brokenhearted. The question “Why me?” can be a difficult one to answer and often leads to frustration and despair. There is a better question to ask ourselves. That question is “What could I learn from this experience?”
What have you learned from your suffering?
Just read The Undaunted about the journey through hole in the rock. It begins in England with a six year old boy who works all day in the coal mine. Later he comes to Utah and makes the incredible trek. Talk about trials. Why do I somehow think my life should be a charmed one? Evidently that is just NOT the plan. Better to say, “My faith is independent of the results.”
When we lived in Colorado, I tended an eight year old neighbor girl before and after school. Tracy was there for scripture reading and family prayer, and although not a member of our faith, she joined in. When her good friend was taken to the hospital with brain cancer, the whole neighborhood was concerned. I remember one day when Linda (Tracy’s mother) dropped by, she asked, “You are religious. Will God heal this child?” I remember thinking that this was my “missionary moment”. I talked about blessings and how we believed that God does heal. I will never forget her next comment. She said, “Oh, I know He CAN heal. I have seen that happen numerous times. But, I’ve noticed that sometimes a child is healed and sometimes he is not. My question is, “WILL He heal her?” I had no pat answer for that question.
Suffering is meant to be part of this life
Life cannot be all sweetness. If it were, it would be nauseating.
In the rodeo of life, if the horse doesn’t buck, you don’t get any points.
C. S. Lewis pointed out that some people are angry with God for His not existing, and others for His existing but for failing to do as mortals would have Him do. Instead of such childishness, we are urged to know God and to learn of His attributes. Neal Maxwell
We should not assume; however, that just because something is unexplainable by us, it is unexplainable. Neal Maxwell
We are told that All Things Work Together for Good. What does that really mean? Have you had experiences that you question?
I look at Joseph Smith and say to myself, “With everything that has gone wrong for you, couldn’t you have just had financial success, been spared from the death of children, had closest friends/apostles be loyal, not have to introduce plural marriage.”
**From Liberty Jail, in a time of anguish and deep suffering for the gospel’s sake, the Prophet Joseph Smith wrote the following message to the Saints: “Dear brethren, do not think that our hearts faint, as though some strange thing had happened unto us, for we have seen and been assured of all these things beforehand, and have an assurance of a better hope than that of our persecutors. Therefore God hath made broad our shoulders for the burden. We glory in our tribulation, because we know that God is with us, that He is our friend, and that He will save our souls.” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 123.)
Trials and tribulations tend to squeeze the artificiality out of us, leaving the essence of what we really are and clarifying what we really yearn for. Neal Maxwell
Message of the Fourth Watch (Michael Wilcox)
Bear Lake: Rowed from where the canyon road hits Garden City to Sweetwater. No one likes to row with me now. Caught in the wind in my rubber raft. Even just twenty yards can take forever. You seem to lose ground. Rowing yields little progress.
Sixth chapter of Mark.
The Savior has fed the five thousand that day, and in the late afternoon, early evening, He is sending his apostles down into the ship. He will dismiss the multitude. He wishes to pray that evening, and then He will meet the apostles a little later. In late afternoon, early evening, the apostles get on the ship; they push out in the Sea of Galilee. The Savior dismisses the multitude, and prays. The Savior could pray a long time; so,
He prays late into the night. We read in Mark what takes place with the apostles:
**And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray. And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land. And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea. (Mark 6:46-48)
In John’s account (John 6:19) of this particular story we read that the apostles had rode the equivalent of about (25-35 furlongs) seventy-five football fields against the wind. There are times in our lives when we toil, rowing against the wind. We are trying to make progress and sometimes it seems that there are forces that are against us. There may be some great blessing that we deeply desire. There may be some trial that we want deeply to be over. And it doesn’t seem like we are making any headway against the wind. We wonder if the Lord is listening.
Now we need to understand something about our Father in Heaven, and that is that He is
a fourth watch God. The Hebrew night was divided into four watches. The first watch—six o’clock at night to nine [p.m.], second watch—nine to midnight, third watch—midnight to three in the morning, fourth watch—three in the morning to sunrise. Sometimes that creates a bit of a problem for us, certainly for me. I worship a fourth watch God. One who tends to feel that it is good to let His children toil in rowing against the wind to face a little opposition. My problem is that I am a first watch person. Now there is something inside of me that understands that it is good for me to toil in rowing against the wind. But certainly by the second watch He would come. And when the second watch has passed and He still has not come. Sometimes I forget that as Mark says, He is watching. He watched them toiling and rowing.
We begin to assume that, number one, He is not there. That is why He’s not responding. And then we calm down and understand that He is there; He is always there. Then the second assumption is if He is there, He must not be listening. And then again, in calmer times —He always listens. Well then the third assumption is He must not care. No—He’s there, He listens, He cares. Maybe the most dangerous assumption, the fourth assumption is I must not be worthy. Now that fourth assumption we are probably correct on. But when has that ever stopped Him from responding; we are as worthy as we can be. We must assume that we have not yet reached the fourth watch; and He is a fourth watch God.
The scriptures are full of fourth watch stories.
We worship a fourth watch God. So when the trials aren’t over and the blessings don’t come, don’t assume that He is not there, or He is not listening, or He doesn’t care, or you’re not worthy. Always assume you have not yet reached the fourth watch. Now occasionally people have said to me, “I’m sure I’m past the fourth watch.” I was once talking with Sheri Dew and she said later, “Mike, I think I’m in the ninth watch—now what?”
My struggles as a teen. Did the “open scriptures and point” method of getting answers:
**D&C 122:7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.
Tight like a Dish. Now that is an expression I think you all will understand—‘Tight like a dish.’ It’s the description of the Jaredite barges.
**Ether 2:9 “They were built after a manner that they were exceedingly tight, even that they would hold water like unto a dish”. “And the bottom thereof was tight like unto a dish. “And the sides thereof were tight like unto a dish. “And the ends thereof were peaked; and the top thereof was tight like unto a dish; and the length thereof was the length of a tree; and the door thereof, when it was shut, was tight like unto a dish”—“Tight like a dish” occurs five times.
We get the impression they are waterproof. It’s like taking a jar and sealing it and throwing it. These are not submarines; they float light like a fowl, we are told, on the water. But the problem is that great waves are going to be washing over them, and so they need to be waterproof. Now being ‘Tight like a dish’ causes two problems for the Jaredites’ crossing of the sea. It was probably Mrs. Moriancumer who pointed them out to her husband: “We can’t breathe in here, and we can’t see, so unless we are going to get the Promised Land in sixty seconds, we’ve got big problems. Did you get the instructions right?”
And so Moriancumer, the brother of Jared, goes back to the Lord, and he presents his two problems. Now you learn something about your Father in Heaven in the solution or the handling of these two problems. Of the two problems—no air and no light—the Lord solves one of them just because He is asked. He tells them to put the holes in so they can have air. And sometimes when we go to the Lord, we simply ask and we will receive. He tells us the solution. The second problem we have to seek and find; for the second problem the Lord says, “You come up with a solution.”
** Ether 2:24 Behold, ye shall be as a whale in the midst of the sea; for the mountain waves shall dash upon you. Nevertheless, I will bring you up again out of the depths of the sea; for the winds have gone forth out of my mouth, and also the rains and the floods have I sent
forth.
Now the reason they need ‘Tight like a dish’ ships is because there are going to be mountain waves. Now what causes mountain waves in the ocean?—wind and storm. And what did the
Lord just say the source of the winds were? “The winds have gone forth out of my mouth, and the rains and floods have I sent forth”—do you have a solution to the problem?
If I were the brother of Jared, I would have said, “Lord, we don’t need these ‘Tight like a dish’ ships at all. Since waves are the problem, and waves are caused by wind, and wind comes out of your mouth—blow softly. Blow softly. Breeze us to the Promised Land. We’ll sit on deck, we’ll fish, we’ll get tanned, we’ll play shuffleboard.” How many here want the first watch cruise version of life?—that’s me; I’m a first watch person. I don’t like mountain waves.
And then the great lesson: We know God can still the storms of our lives—we know that; there are precedents. But he prefers to do something else: Behold, I prepare you against these things; for ye cannot cross this great deep save I prepare you against the waves of the sea, and the winds which have gone forth, and the floods which shall come. What will ye that I should prepare for you that ye may have light when ye are swallowed up in the depths of the sea? (Ether 2:25)
What we need to understand about our Father in Heaven is that He prefers to prepare us to face the storms of life, the contrary winds, rather than to still them. Somewhere in the past of your life, experiences have been placed by a wise and foresighted Father in Heaven to prepare you to face the very things that you are facing. As the lion and the bear came to David, before Goliath, to prepare him to face Goliath, so will lion-and bear moments come in your lives before the Goliath moments come. Because if your ship was not tight like a dish and you have reached the fourth watch, He will come to you and still the storm. So if the storm is not still, we must assume our ship is tight like a dish.
** 1 Samuel 17:34 And David said unto Saul, Thy servant kept his father's sheep, and there came a lion, and a bear, and took a lamb out of the flock:
35 and I went out after him, and smote him, and delivered it out of his mouth: and when he arose against me, I caught him by his beard, and smote him, and slew him.
36 Thy servant slew both the lion and the bear: and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be as one of them, seeing he hath defied the armies of the living God.
Sometimes we don’t understand the Lord’s answers because the answers that we are getting may not be the ones we particularly want.
We will Grow
Roger Sorensen (who was in charge of the Hill Cummorah Pageant) BYU Devotional July 29, 2008
Evidences of the heart
Seats at Hill Cummorah Pageant. 8000 chairs set up for 11 days. After chairs removed, the grass in the aisles is so tramped down, it looks dead. The field is a modified checkerboard of long green grass where the chairs have been sitting and ten foot wide grass is either tramped down and seemingly dead (in dry years) or a muddy bog in wet years. It grows back stronger every year. Service and sacrifice (especially when performed in the arms of adversity) strengthen our souls and soften our hearts. The grass in the aisle is so distinct that they can almost set up the chairs. The grass in the aisle is hardier and darker than the grass where the chairs sit.
We may never know in this life why we face what we do, but we can feel confident that we can grow from the experience. Has this been your experience?
Each of us will face adversity no matter where we are. We are taught in the scriptures that there “must needs be . . . an opposition in all things.”1 We will each face times of difficulty, and the question is not when we will face them but how we face them.
Our Heavenly Father, who loves us completely and perfectly, permits us to have experiences that will allow us to develop the traits and attributes we need to become more and more Christlike.
**Hugh B. Brown: If we banish hardship we banish hardihood; out of the same door with calamity walk courage, fortitude, triumphant faith, and sacrificial love. If we abolish the cross in the world, we make impossible the Christ in man.
**Hugh B Brown: Such is the experience of mortality—a series of mountains with intervening valleys. Some come into this world seriously handicapped and, it would appear, scarcely able to cope with life’s vicissitudes. But let us remember that when we handicap a competitor in any event by giving others an advantage, we acknowledge his superiority. Nature’s handicaps are often compliments. Struggle and strength travel together. What must appear to some as failure can be to another the very motivation necessary to develop a needed virtue. “Defeat may serve as well as victory to shake the soul and let the glory out.” One man’s disillusion may be another’s inspiration. The same exposure to pain, misery, and sorrow that coarsens the mind and calluses the soul of one may give to another a power of compassionate understanding and humility without which mere achievement remains primitive.
**I walked a mile with pleasure, she chattered all the way;
Leaving me none the wiser, with all she had to say.
And I walked a mile with sorrow, never a word said she;
But oh the things I learned from her, when sorrow walked with me.
Robert Browning Hamilton
Kim (after her last blessing): Don’t you just want the blessing that says, “Everything is going to be fine” and not the blessing that says, “Your shoulders will be strengthened so you can withstand the trials.”
What things can help us face our own trials?
Attitude
“Pain is inevitable, but misery is optional. We cannot avoid pain, but we can avoid joy.” Tim Hansel
“Man is that he might have joy”. – Joy is a CHOICE! Cindy Stettler
Attitude: When LeGrand Richards was 96, he went out and bought two new suits. He said, “I’m shooting for 100.” Well, he didn’t make it too 100. He became very will. The doctors told him they would have to remove a leg to get rid of all the infection. When people came to visit him, he would cheer them up. “I love life so much, for the Lord to get me out of this life, He had to take me one piece at a time. I’m glad he started with that end.” Sometime later a friend asked, “How are you feeling?” He smiled and answered, “Well, frankly, I feel like I’m on my last leg.” (told by Scott Anderson)
Peter was a car accident victim whose gas tank ended up in his lap. His burns were so severe, they thought he was dead and pushed him aisde. Finally, they realized he was still alive. He was in the hospital for four months, still struggling to live. He was in terrible pain. He was badly burned. He had no nose, just the bony top part. He had no lips, just his teeth coming out. He had no ears, just holes in the side of his head. I don’t say this to be gross, but it was the fact. He looked so bad, nurses would have to leave the room to get their composure before they could go back to care for him. Scar tissue covered his eyes. He asked that it be removed first so he could tell if he could see. One night he pulled the bandages from his eyes and pulled the bedpan up so he could see himself in the reflection. He looked at himself in the bedpan that night and saw himself for the first time since the accident. He started crying. A nurse heard him crying and thought he was in pain. She came in to see the scene. He looked at her and said, “I can see! I am so grateful I can see.”
Prayer Third, when we face our challenges, we must seek greater help from God. Even the Savior of us all found a need to pray “more earnestly” as He was in the Garden of Gethsemane.5 We can learn to gain great faith if we do this. We must remember that often the answers from our Heavenly Father do not remove the trial from us, but instead He helps strengthen us as we pass through the experience. As He did for the followers of Alma, the Lord can “ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs.”6 In our trials, let us not become bitter or uncommitted, but let us follow the Savior’s example of becoming more earnest, more sincere, and more faithful.
Service I think we become more compassionate as we suffer pain.
In our last general conference, our beloved prophet, President Thomas S. Monson, stated: “I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives.
Testimony gives us the eternal perspective necessary to see past the trials or challenges we will inevitably face.
Remember what Heber C. Kimball prophesied:
“The time will come when no man nor woman will be able to endure on borrowed light. Each will have to be guided by the light within himself. …
“… If you don’t have it you will not stand; therefore seek for the testimony of Jesus and cleave to it, that when the trying time comes you may not stumble and fall.” 15
Patience
John Groberg: Some say, “But it has been years. We have fasted and prayed so long and so hard. What does the Lord expect?”
There may be many answers. I give only one. That is: He expects more, and it will be for your eternal benefit and blessing. That I know. As we begin to comprehend eternity, we gain a whole new catalog of values.
“Seek not to counsel the Lord, but to take counsel from his hand. For behold, ye yourselves know that he counseleth in wisdom, and in justice, and in great mercy, over all his works.” (Jacob 4:8, 10.)
Faith “Would you ever do something that would cause pain and bring tears to your children when they have done nothing wrong?” Of course you would! When mothers take young children to the doctor to receive immunizations, almost every child leaves the doctor’s office in tears. Why do you do that? Because you know that a small amount of pain now will protect them from possible pain and suffering in the future. Our Father in Heaven knows the end from the beginning. We need to follow the example of the Savior and trust in Him.
John Groberg On a small Pacific island an infant girl was born to a faithful family. They called her Felila. There was happiness and joy as this grateful spirit made her debut into mortal life, but soon there were problems. Her head was abnormally large. The doctors diagnosed it as hydrocephalus. The questions of brain damage, of normalcy, of other problems all raised their haunting heads. After much fasting and prayer the elders quorum president approached the branch president, who in turn talked with the district president, who after adequate checking came to me as the mission president to see if there were some additional help available.
The medical authorities were consulted, and it was determined that there was little if anything they could do locally. Letters were written, information was sent back and forth, x-rays were taken and analyzed. There was so much to do—so many questions to be answered, so many pieces to fit together. Finally after exasperatingly long delays, things began to fall into place. A family in Salt Lake agreed to accept full responsibility for the infant, even if it meant years of outpatient care; the doctors agreed on the possibility of her eventual recovery; the hospital accepted the case on a service basis; funds were raised for her air fare; some local travelers arranged their schedules to bring her right to the hospital. But there were other problems—visas, health certificates, reservations, passports.
All during these trying days the family, and the elders quorum, and even the whole branch continued to fast and pray. The time of departure of the infrequent airplane grew near.
One morning, amidst myriads of other pressing matters, I had the strong impression that I must take the time now and put forth the extra effort required to get everything done so she could go. I got on the overseas telephone. The consulate finally agreed to issue a visa; the airlines made a special reservation; the passport people agreed to waive the normal regulations; others gave that extra effort and cooperation; and soon all was in order.
Normally I would have sent someone to bring the family in to sign the final papers, but again I felt strongly impressed that I should personally go and see the branch president. I located him in the early afternoon near the school where he was teaching. He was standing alone outside as though he were waiting for me.
Excitedly I ran up to him: “Guess what? It’s all set. Miraculously everything has worked out and Felila can leave tomorrow. Please get word to the family immediately.”
His calm, penetrating gaze quelled my exuberance. “It’s true,” I said. “I know it’s been long and there have been lots of disappointments, but she really is going now. What’s the matter?”
His steady gaze seemed to penetrate my very soul. Then softly in his liquid native tongue he informed me that when all the preparations had been made, when the hearts of so many had been stretched in service, when the goal of unity and selflessness had been achieved in those many hearts, when all had made the final commitment of others above self, at the height of all this activity that very morning, little Felila had quietly and unobtrusively slipped away—gone to that better care which so many had fasted and prayed and worked so long and hard for her to receive.
Gone? This morning? But all that work, all that time, all that fasting and praying and those strong feelings. Gone? No!
Without once shifting his gaze, he, having more faith than I, offered a few words of truth and encouragement, then quietly turned and rejoined his class.
And I was left alone, or so it seemed. I moved slowly and heavily down that dusty trail. Why? Why? After all that work and that strong faith of so many and those impressions, why?
I sensed the brightness of the sun and felt the warmth of the breeze as it lazily tossed the palm leaves and slowly shifted the silent clouds against the clear blue sky. A feeling came over me. I realized that the earth was beautiful, that life went on and was eternal. And while I cannot describe fully what happened next, part of the experience is proper to relate. The best explanation is contained in the phrase, “I was overcome by the Spirit.” It was as though one took me by the hand and led me to a high place and stood by me and said, “Look.” And I looked and beheld such beauty and magnificence as man cannot conceive. And I heard a voice, such a tender, compassionate voice—yet so unmistakably powerful—that all nature stood still and listened and obeyed.
“Come home, Felila, my daughter. Come home to the care your loved ones have sought for you. I have heard their prayers and have known their fasting and love for you, and I answer, Come home, my daughter. You have finished your mission in life. Hearts have been softened; souls have been stretched; faith has been increased. Come home now, Felila.”
He knew her! He knew her name. He knew all about her and about all those others. How perfect our Father’s love! He had heard the prayers. He had done what was best. He knew everything—which thing, though I believed, I never had supposed. In some marvelous way, which is beyond our mortal comprehension, he knows and understands all things.
I did teach today; Here's the lesson. It has some good stories.
All Things Work Together for Good Elder James B. Martino
** [D&C 90:24]: “Search diligently, pray always, and be believing, and all things shall work together for your good, if ye walk uprightly.”
Stunning promise - repeated many times in the scriptures, particularly to people or prophets who are suffering through the trials.
As a young girl in Primary, I was told that if I had the faith of a mustard seed, I could move mountains. I had no real need to move a mountain, but I did have something else I wanted. I wanted a magic wand. I had heard about them and knew of their power, so I decided to put my faith to work on getting a magic wand. Now, of course, my teacher told us that we couldn’t just expect our prayers to be answered immediately. I had complete faith that if I just prayed long enough and hard enough my prayer would be answered in the affirmative. It wasn’t. Why?
All suffering has a purpose!
Joseph B Wirthlin: I have lived long enough to experience firsthand many of the challenges of life. I have known exceptional people who have endured severe trials while others, at least on the surface, seem to have lived charmed lives. Often those who struggle with adversity ask the question “Why did this happen to me?” They spend sleepless nights wondering why they feel so lonely, sick, discouraged, oppressed, or brokenhearted. The question “Why me?” can be a difficult one to answer and often leads to frustration and despair. There is a better question to ask ourselves. That question is “What could I learn from this experience?”
What have you learned from your suffering?
Just read The Undaunted about the journey through hole in the rock. It begins in England with a six year old boy who works all day in the coal mine. Later he comes to Utah and makes the incredible trek. Talk about trials. Why do I somehow think my life should be a charmed one? Evidently that is just NOT the plan. Better to say, “My faith is independent of the results.”
When we lived in Colorado, I tended an eight year old neighbor girl before and after school. Tracy was there for scripture reading and family prayer, and although not a member of our faith, she joined in. When her good friend was taken to the hospital with brain cancer, the whole neighborhood was concerned. I remember one day when Linda (Tracy’s mother) dropped by, she asked, “You are religious. Will God heal this child?” I remember thinking that this was my “missionary moment”. I talked about blessings and how we believed that God does heal. I will never forget her next comment. She said, “Oh, I know He CAN heal. I have seen that happen numerous times. But, I’ve noticed that sometimes a child is healed and sometimes he is not. My question is, “WILL He heal her?” I had no pat answer for that question.
Suffering is meant to be part of this life
Life cannot be all sweetness. If it were, it would be nauseating.
In the rodeo of life, if the horse doesn’t buck, you don’t get any points.
C. S. Lewis pointed out that some people are angry with God for His not existing, and others for His existing but for failing to do as mortals would have Him do. Instead of such childishness, we are urged to know God and to learn of His attributes. Neal Maxwell
We should not assume; however, that just because something is unexplainable by us, it is unexplainable. Neal Maxwell
We are told that All Things Work Together for Good. What does that really mean? Have you had experiences that you question?
I look at Joseph Smith and say to myself, “With everything that has gone wrong for you, couldn’t you have just had financial success, been spared from the death of children, had closest friends/apostles be loyal, not have to introduce plural marriage.”
**From Liberty Jail, in a time of anguish and deep suffering for the gospel’s sake, the Prophet Joseph Smith wrote the following message to the Saints: “Dear brethren, do not think that our hearts faint, as though some strange thing had happened unto us, for we have seen and been assured of all these things beforehand, and have an assurance of a better hope than that of our persecutors. Therefore God hath made broad our shoulders for the burden. We glory in our tribulation, because we know that God is with us, that He is our friend, and that He will save our souls.” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 123.)
Trials and tribulations tend to squeeze the artificiality out of us, leaving the essence of what we really are and clarifying what we really yearn for. Neal Maxwell
Message of the Fourth Watch (Michael Wilcox)
Bear Lake: Rowed from where the canyon road hits Garden City to Sweetwater. No one likes to row with me now. Caught in the wind in my rubber raft. Even just twenty yards can take forever. You seem to lose ground. Rowing yields little progress.
Sixth chapter of Mark.
The Savior has fed the five thousand that day, and in the late afternoon, early evening, He is sending his apostles down into the ship. He will dismiss the multitude. He wishes to pray that evening, and then He will meet the apostles a little later. In late afternoon, early evening, the apostles get on the ship; they push out in the Sea of Galilee. The Savior dismisses the multitude, and prays. The Savior could pray a long time; so,
He prays late into the night. We read in Mark what takes place with the apostles:
**And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray. And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land. And he saw them toiling in rowing; for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea. (Mark 6:46-48)
In John’s account (John 6:19) of this particular story we read that the apostles had rode the equivalent of about (25-35 furlongs) seventy-five football fields against the wind. There are times in our lives when we toil, rowing against the wind. We are trying to make progress and sometimes it seems that there are forces that are against us. There may be some great blessing that we deeply desire. There may be some trial that we want deeply to be over. And it doesn’t seem like we are making any headway against the wind. We wonder if the Lord is listening.
Now we need to understand something about our Father in Heaven, and that is that He is
a fourth watch God. The Hebrew night was divided into four watches. The first watch—six o’clock at night to nine [p.m.], second watch—nine to midnight, third watch—midnight to three in the morning, fourth watch—three in the morning to sunrise. Sometimes that creates a bit of a problem for us, certainly for me. I worship a fourth watch God. One who tends to feel that it is good to let His children toil in rowing against the wind to face a little opposition. My problem is that I am a first watch person. Now there is something inside of me that understands that it is good for me to toil in rowing against the wind. But certainly by the second watch He would come. And when the second watch has passed and He still has not come. Sometimes I forget that as Mark says, He is watching. He watched them toiling and rowing.
We begin to assume that, number one, He is not there. That is why He’s not responding. And then we calm down and understand that He is there; He is always there. Then the second assumption is if He is there, He must not be listening. And then again, in calmer times —He always listens. Well then the third assumption is He must not care. No—He’s there, He listens, He cares. Maybe the most dangerous assumption, the fourth assumption is I must not be worthy. Now that fourth assumption we are probably correct on. But when has that ever stopped Him from responding; we are as worthy as we can be. We must assume that we have not yet reached the fourth watch; and He is a fourth watch God.
The scriptures are full of fourth watch stories.
We worship a fourth watch God. So when the trials aren’t over and the blessings don’t come, don’t assume that He is not there, or He is not listening, or He doesn’t care, or you’re not worthy. Always assume you have not yet reached the fourth watch. Now occasionally people have said to me, “I’m sure I’m past the fourth watch.” I was once talking with Sheri Dew and she said later, “Mike, I think I’m in the ninth watch—now what?”
My struggles as a teen. Did the “open scriptures and point” method of getting answers:
**D&C 122:7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.
Tight like a Dish. Now that is an expression I think you all will understand—‘Tight like a dish.’ It’s the description of the Jaredite barges.
**Ether 2:9 “They were built after a manner that they were exceedingly tight, even that they would hold water like unto a dish”. “And the bottom thereof was tight like unto a dish. “And the sides thereof were tight like unto a dish. “And the ends thereof were peaked; and the top thereof was tight like unto a dish; and the length thereof was the length of a tree; and the door thereof, when it was shut, was tight like unto a dish”—“Tight like a dish” occurs five times.
We get the impression they are waterproof. It’s like taking a jar and sealing it and throwing it. These are not submarines; they float light like a fowl, we are told, on the water. But the problem is that great waves are going to be washing over them, and so they need to be waterproof. Now being ‘Tight like a dish’ causes two problems for the Jaredites’ crossing of the sea. It was probably Mrs. Moriancumer who pointed them out to her husband: “We can’t breathe in here, and we can’t see, so unless we are going to get the Promised Land in sixty seconds, we’ve got big problems. Did you get the instructions right?”
And so Moriancumer, the brother of Jared, goes back to the Lord, and he presents his two problems. Now you learn something about your Father in Heaven in the solution or the handling of these two problems. Of the two problems—no air and no light—the Lord solves one of them just because He is asked. He tells them to put the holes in so they can have air. And sometimes when we go to the Lord, we simply ask and we will receive. He tells us the solution. The second problem we have to seek and find; for the second problem the Lord says, “You come up with a solution.”
** Ether 2:24 Behold, ye shall be as a whale in the midst of the sea; for the mountain waves shall dash upon you. Nevertheless, I will bring you up again out of the depths of the sea; for the winds have gone forth out of my mouth, and also the rains and the floods have I sent
forth.
Now the reason they need ‘Tight like a dish’ ships is because there are going to be mountain waves. Now what causes mountain waves in the ocean?—wind and storm. And what did the
Lord just say the source of the winds were? “The winds have gone forth out of my mouth, and the rains and floods have I sent forth”—do you have a solution to the problem?
If I were the brother of Jared, I would have said, “Lord, we don’t need these ‘Tight like a dish’ ships at all. Since waves are the problem, and waves are caused by wind, and wind comes out of your mouth—blow softly. Blow softly. Breeze us to the Promised Land. We’ll sit on deck, we’ll fish, we’ll get tanned, we’ll play shuffleboard.” How many here want the first watch cruise version of life?—that’s me; I’m a first watch person. I don’t like mountain waves.
And then the great lesson: We know God can still the storms of our lives—we know that; there are precedents. But he prefers to do something else: Behold, I prepare you against these things; for ye cannot cross this great deep save I prepare you against the waves of the sea, and the winds which have gone forth, and the floods which shall come. What will ye that I should prepare for you that ye may have light when ye are swallowed up in the depths of the sea? (Ether 2:25)
What we need to understand about our Father in Heaven is that He prefers to prepare us to face the storms of life, the contrary winds, rather than to still them. Somewhere in the past of your life, experiences have been placed by a wise and foresighted Father in Heaven to prepare you to face the very things that you are facing. As the lion and the bear came to David, before Goliath, to prepare him to face Goliath, so will lion-and bear moments come in your lives before the Goliath moments come. Because if your ship was not tight like a dish and you have reached the fourth watch, He will come to you and still the storm. So if the storm is not still, we must assume our ship is tight like a dish.
** 1 Samuel 17:34 And David said unto Saul, Thy servant kept his father's sheep, and there came a lion, and a bear, and took a lamb out of the flock:
35 and I went out after him, and smote him, and delivered it out of his mouth: and when he arose against me, I caught him by his beard, and smote him, and slew him.
36 Thy servant slew both the lion and the bear: and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be as one of them, seeing he hath defied the armies of the living God.
Sometimes we don’t understand the Lord’s answers because the answers that we are getting may not be the ones we particularly want.
We will Grow
Roger Sorensen (who was in charge of the Hill Cummorah Pageant) BYU Devotional July 29, 2008
Evidences of the heart
Seats at Hill Cummorah Pageant. 8000 chairs set up for 11 days. After chairs removed, the grass in the aisles is so tramped down, it looks dead. The field is a modified checkerboard of long green grass where the chairs have been sitting and ten foot wide grass is either tramped down and seemingly dead (in dry years) or a muddy bog in wet years. It grows back stronger every year. Service and sacrifice (especially when performed in the arms of adversity) strengthen our souls and soften our hearts. The grass in the aisle is so distinct that they can almost set up the chairs. The grass in the aisle is hardier and darker than the grass where the chairs sit.
We may never know in this life why we face what we do, but we can feel confident that we can grow from the experience. Has this been your experience?
Each of us will face adversity no matter where we are. We are taught in the scriptures that there “must needs be . . . an opposition in all things.”1 We will each face times of difficulty, and the question is not when we will face them but how we face them.
Our Heavenly Father, who loves us completely and perfectly, permits us to have experiences that will allow us to develop the traits and attributes we need to become more and more Christlike.
**Hugh B. Brown: If we banish hardship we banish hardihood; out of the same door with calamity walk courage, fortitude, triumphant faith, and sacrificial love. If we abolish the cross in the world, we make impossible the Christ in man.
**Hugh B Brown: Such is the experience of mortality—a series of mountains with intervening valleys. Some come into this world seriously handicapped and, it would appear, scarcely able to cope with life’s vicissitudes. But let us remember that when we handicap a competitor in any event by giving others an advantage, we acknowledge his superiority. Nature’s handicaps are often compliments. Struggle and strength travel together. What must appear to some as failure can be to another the very motivation necessary to develop a needed virtue. “Defeat may serve as well as victory to shake the soul and let the glory out.” One man’s disillusion may be another’s inspiration. The same exposure to pain, misery, and sorrow that coarsens the mind and calluses the soul of one may give to another a power of compassionate understanding and humility without which mere achievement remains primitive.
**I walked a mile with pleasure, she chattered all the way;
Leaving me none the wiser, with all she had to say.
And I walked a mile with sorrow, never a word said she;
But oh the things I learned from her, when sorrow walked with me.
Robert Browning Hamilton
Kim (after her last blessing): Don’t you just want the blessing that says, “Everything is going to be fine” and not the blessing that says, “Your shoulders will be strengthened so you can withstand the trials.”
What things can help us face our own trials?
Attitude
“Pain is inevitable, but misery is optional. We cannot avoid pain, but we can avoid joy.” Tim Hansel
“Man is that he might have joy”. – Joy is a CHOICE! Cindy Stettler
Attitude: When LeGrand Richards was 96, he went out and bought two new suits. He said, “I’m shooting for 100.” Well, he didn’t make it too 100. He became very will. The doctors told him they would have to remove a leg to get rid of all the infection. When people came to visit him, he would cheer them up. “I love life so much, for the Lord to get me out of this life, He had to take me one piece at a time. I’m glad he started with that end.” Sometime later a friend asked, “How are you feeling?” He smiled and answered, “Well, frankly, I feel like I’m on my last leg.” (told by Scott Anderson)
Peter was a car accident victim whose gas tank ended up in his lap. His burns were so severe, they thought he was dead and pushed him aisde. Finally, they realized he was still alive. He was in the hospital for four months, still struggling to live. He was in terrible pain. He was badly burned. He had no nose, just the bony top part. He had no lips, just his teeth coming out. He had no ears, just holes in the side of his head. I don’t say this to be gross, but it was the fact. He looked so bad, nurses would have to leave the room to get their composure before they could go back to care for him. Scar tissue covered his eyes. He asked that it be removed first so he could tell if he could see. One night he pulled the bandages from his eyes and pulled the bedpan up so he could see himself in the reflection. He looked at himself in the bedpan that night and saw himself for the first time since the accident. He started crying. A nurse heard him crying and thought he was in pain. She came in to see the scene. He looked at her and said, “I can see! I am so grateful I can see.”
Prayer Third, when we face our challenges, we must seek greater help from God. Even the Savior of us all found a need to pray “more earnestly” as He was in the Garden of Gethsemane.5 We can learn to gain great faith if we do this. We must remember that often the answers from our Heavenly Father do not remove the trial from us, but instead He helps strengthen us as we pass through the experience. As He did for the followers of Alma, the Lord can “ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs.”6 In our trials, let us not become bitter or uncommitted, but let us follow the Savior’s example of becoming more earnest, more sincere, and more faithful.
Service I think we become more compassionate as we suffer pain.
In our last general conference, our beloved prophet, President Thomas S. Monson, stated: “I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives.
Testimony gives us the eternal perspective necessary to see past the trials or challenges we will inevitably face.
Remember what Heber C. Kimball prophesied:
“The time will come when no man nor woman will be able to endure on borrowed light. Each will have to be guided by the light within himself. …
“… If you don’t have it you will not stand; therefore seek for the testimony of Jesus and cleave to it, that when the trying time comes you may not stumble and fall.” 15
Patience
John Groberg: Some say, “But it has been years. We have fasted and prayed so long and so hard. What does the Lord expect?”
There may be many answers. I give only one. That is: He expects more, and it will be for your eternal benefit and blessing. That I know. As we begin to comprehend eternity, we gain a whole new catalog of values.
“Seek not to counsel the Lord, but to take counsel from his hand. For behold, ye yourselves know that he counseleth in wisdom, and in justice, and in great mercy, over all his works.” (Jacob 4:8, 10.)
Faith “Would you ever do something that would cause pain and bring tears to your children when they have done nothing wrong?” Of course you would! When mothers take young children to the doctor to receive immunizations, almost every child leaves the doctor’s office in tears. Why do you do that? Because you know that a small amount of pain now will protect them from possible pain and suffering in the future. Our Father in Heaven knows the end from the beginning. We need to follow the example of the Savior and trust in Him.
John Groberg On a small Pacific island an infant girl was born to a faithful family. They called her Felila. There was happiness and joy as this grateful spirit made her debut into mortal life, but soon there were problems. Her head was abnormally large. The doctors diagnosed it as hydrocephalus. The questions of brain damage, of normalcy, of other problems all raised their haunting heads. After much fasting and prayer the elders quorum president approached the branch president, who in turn talked with the district president, who after adequate checking came to me as the mission president to see if there were some additional help available.
The medical authorities were consulted, and it was determined that there was little if anything they could do locally. Letters were written, information was sent back and forth, x-rays were taken and analyzed. There was so much to do—so many questions to be answered, so many pieces to fit together. Finally after exasperatingly long delays, things began to fall into place. A family in Salt Lake agreed to accept full responsibility for the infant, even if it meant years of outpatient care; the doctors agreed on the possibility of her eventual recovery; the hospital accepted the case on a service basis; funds were raised for her air fare; some local travelers arranged their schedules to bring her right to the hospital. But there were other problems—visas, health certificates, reservations, passports.
All during these trying days the family, and the elders quorum, and even the whole branch continued to fast and pray. The time of departure of the infrequent airplane grew near.
One morning, amidst myriads of other pressing matters, I had the strong impression that I must take the time now and put forth the extra effort required to get everything done so she could go. I got on the overseas telephone. The consulate finally agreed to issue a visa; the airlines made a special reservation; the passport people agreed to waive the normal regulations; others gave that extra effort and cooperation; and soon all was in order.
Normally I would have sent someone to bring the family in to sign the final papers, but again I felt strongly impressed that I should personally go and see the branch president. I located him in the early afternoon near the school where he was teaching. He was standing alone outside as though he were waiting for me.
Excitedly I ran up to him: “Guess what? It’s all set. Miraculously everything has worked out and Felila can leave tomorrow. Please get word to the family immediately.”
His calm, penetrating gaze quelled my exuberance. “It’s true,” I said. “I know it’s been long and there have been lots of disappointments, but she really is going now. What’s the matter?”
His steady gaze seemed to penetrate my very soul. Then softly in his liquid native tongue he informed me that when all the preparations had been made, when the hearts of so many had been stretched in service, when the goal of unity and selflessness had been achieved in those many hearts, when all had made the final commitment of others above self, at the height of all this activity that very morning, little Felila had quietly and unobtrusively slipped away—gone to that better care which so many had fasted and prayed and worked so long and hard for her to receive.
Gone? This morning? But all that work, all that time, all that fasting and praying and those strong feelings. Gone? No!
Without once shifting his gaze, he, having more faith than I, offered a few words of truth and encouragement, then quietly turned and rejoined his class.
And I was left alone, or so it seemed. I moved slowly and heavily down that dusty trail. Why? Why? After all that work and that strong faith of so many and those impressions, why?
I sensed the brightness of the sun and felt the warmth of the breeze as it lazily tossed the palm leaves and slowly shifted the silent clouds against the clear blue sky. A feeling came over me. I realized that the earth was beautiful, that life went on and was eternal. And while I cannot describe fully what happened next, part of the experience is proper to relate. The best explanation is contained in the phrase, “I was overcome by the Spirit.” It was as though one took me by the hand and led me to a high place and stood by me and said, “Look.” And I looked and beheld such beauty and magnificence as man cannot conceive. And I heard a voice, such a tender, compassionate voice—yet so unmistakably powerful—that all nature stood still and listened and obeyed.
“Come home, Felila, my daughter. Come home to the care your loved ones have sought for you. I have heard their prayers and have known their fasting and love for you, and I answer, Come home, my daughter. You have finished your mission in life. Hearts have been softened; souls have been stretched; faith has been increased. Come home now, Felila.”
He knew her! He knew her name. He knew all about her and about all those others. How perfect our Father’s love! He had heard the prayers. He had done what was best. He knew everything—which thing, though I believed, I never had supposed. In some marvelous way, which is beyond our mortal comprehension, he knows and understands all things.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Word clouds?
I tried my own word cloud (using words from a recent blog). Thanks to my sister-in-law, Lori, for the idea! A word cloud takes a bunch of words and creates a picture out of them. Words that are used more are bigger. I thought it looked like a "tasty" set of words.
Its at http://www.wordle.net/ if you want to try it yourself.
Its too bad we don't have word clouds for our thoughts, so we can easily see what we are focusing on, what we are telling ourselves.
In our enrichment meeting last month, a psychologist in our ward (Bruce) talked about self-esteem. He said that our self-talk is so important to our self-esteem.
Bruce asked us to write down the attributes we have inherited from our Heavenly parents. Take a minute to do it! It is interesting.
Then he said, "Compare our knowledge of our Godly attributes to how the world would evaluate us." Everything in the world is about COMPARISON. Such comparisons tend to make us insecure.
He said that in order to deal with insecurity, we should
a. pray and ask to see ourselves as God sees us AND to be able to see others as God sees them.
b. Read our Patriarchical blessings
c. Listen to uplifting music
He talked about the seeds of deity that are in each of us - essential characteristics. He said, we can't really lose those characteristics.
We should focus on our Godly attributes.
Lorenzo Snow (1814-1901) -
I believe that men and women have the image of God given them-are formed after the image of God, and possess deity in their nature and character, and that their spiritual organization possesses the qualities and properties of God, and that there is the principle of God in every individual.
We read Ether 12:27 where it talks of weakness being a gift: I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.
And also 2 Corinthians 12:9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Bruce asked the question, "If weakness is a gift, is it a sin?" He later commented, "We can continue to have weakness and still become perfect in God."
He made an interesting comment. He said, "We need to learn to nurture ourselves." As you are criticizing yourself, listen to yourself as a friend would and tell yourself the nurturing words a friend would say.
We end up incorporating things into ourselves that have been said to us. They may occlude the diamond that is there. We start on a path of believing in a false self. Our self-esteem is often on a roller coaster - depending on how we did at the moment.
Turn your nurturing voice on yourself. Be willing to give yourself a new day. Ask yourself, "What did I do well? What is it about me that allows me to do that thing well?" There is a difference between boasting and noting things that are true. The latter gives us the power to use our talents.
Are you being fair with yourself? When you get caught up with comparisons, listen to the voices inside your head. Once you hear what you are saying, write them down. Analyze them, "Is it true?" See yourself in the role of a mother or friend. Imagine you are talking to someone else - that they are saying the things you are saying. What would you say to them?
Control the ANTs: Automatic, Negative, Thoughts.
Remember that people who are full of themselves are ALWAYS tortured souls. Insecurity lies at the base. Those who are truly self-confident have no need to tell you!
Robins...
We went to Boise for the weekend and had a great time. Brooke asked me to take pictures of the robins who have hatched under our deck. While you CAN see them through the floor of the deck, my photos don't show anything. I'll augment them with pictures that resemble what I can see.
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